Forgive. Don't waste energy with resentment.

Well-being 🌿 | Letting go 🍃 | #Forgiveness #Letting go #Compassion

TL;DR

• Forgiveness doesn't mean condoning behavior but letting go of negative emotions and taking back control of one's emotional state.

• It can lead to greater empathy and compassion, allowing us to see situations from others' perspectives and find common ground.

• Forgiveness is a continuous process that requires effort and commitment, leading to increased happiness and emotional freedom.

Photo by Alex Shute on Unsplash

Seed

Forgiveness is a powerful tool that can lead to greater peace and happiness in our lives. When we hold onto resentment and anger towards others, we waste precious energy that could be used for more positive pursuits.

One common misconception about forgiveness is that it means we condone or excuse the behaviour of the person who hurt us. This is not the case. Forgiving someone does not mean that we have to forget what they did or even reconcile with them. It simply means that we are choosing to let go of the negative emotions associated with the situation and stop dwelling on the past.

“You can forgive a person without forgiving their behaviour.”¹

By forgiving, we are taking back control of our own emotional state. Resentment and anger towards others mainly harm ourselves. And often the person we are angry with may not even be aware of our feelings. It’s a waste of our energy and mental space to hold onto these negative emotions.

Forgiveness can also lead to greater empathy and compassion towards others. When we forgive someone, we acknowledge that they are human and make mistakes. It can help us to see situations from their perspective and find common ground.

Of course, forgiveness is not always easy. It may feel like you are giving in or being weak by letting go of the anger. Forgiving requires you to put your ego aside and look at the bigger picture. But as difficult as it can be, it's a powerful way to take back control of your own happiness and well-being.

It’s also important to remember that forgiveness is not a one-time event. It’s a continuous process that requires effort and commitment. And the benefits of forgiveness, such as increased happiness and emotional freedom, are well worth the effort.

Example

No parent is perfect. But most parents are doing their best given their abilities and the context they’re in. So we all drag some hurtful childhood feelings due to the education we received or more generally how our parents treated us.

If you find it difficult to let go of those negative feelings, remember that you can show compassion towards your parents who maybe didn’t mean to hurt you. You can show compassion to yourself if the way you reacted at that time wasn’t the best. And you can always forgive them and yourself, as a person. That doesn’t mean that you will forget or forgive what happened. But at least, you don’t have to hold onto those feelings towards your parents.

Moreover - and we will talk in-depth about this in another Seed - today they are probably different than who they were at that time. This also applies to yourself. Therefore, does it make sense to keep feeding emotions towards your past selves?

Bonus

You can also reflect on this Seed when it’s about forgiving yourself. Sometimes we can be harder on ourselves or hold onto grudges longer than we would with others.

1. Samuel Buisseret “Mr. Sam - Point d'interrogation” | French speaking YouTube channel about critical thinking